Have you ever had anyone just up and vanish from your life? Like “poof” they’re just gone? I think we probably have all had this experience with someone, because not everyone, who comes into our lives, comes in for the right reason or at the right time, or with the right intentions. They linger for a while, sap some of your energy, then perplexingly leave. Vanish. Ghost.
I sometimes wonder where they are and how they are doing. It makes me question whether they had come into my life to teach me that people just come and go at will.
I have to admit that I have also pulled this stunt and vanished myself. I’ve tried to step out of situations with people that were just not right. And sometimes extracting oneself from those situations means you have to sever all contact, or “ghost” them. It never makes me feel good, but sometimes it’s necessary for self-preservation reasons. Either that person wasn’t good for me or I wasn’t good for her. Either way vanishing on someone probably isn’t really very nice to do. But we all do it.
If a relationship of any kind – ie romantic, friendship, etc. – is going to end for whatever reason, I would rather have closure with the person, talk about why we should go our separate ways and wish them luck in their journey. I like to have things “on the table” so to speak. And in getting closure you feel a lot less slimy about it. Plus the idea of getting closure means you can say those things you may need to say to the person in order to clear your head and move on.
I believe that we can learn from every person that we meet in life. Everyone has something special or unique to offer. When they come into your life they come for a reason, and you may not know what it is or see the reason until long after they are gone, but there was a reason for sure. Perhaps it was to teach some lesson or to learn something about yourself.
I have learned many lessons from people who came into my life and have since vanished from it. One of the things that is most prominent is that nothing is forever; nothing is permanent or infallible. No matter how close you get to someone, something can always happen to destroy that intimacy, and it’s better to be cautious of who you let into your world than to continually be destroyed by people choosing to vanish on you.
Perhaps I am jaded here. Perhaps I have a skewed opinion of this because I’m bitter about some people who have chosen to vanish from my own life. I hate when I wonder about them and how they are doing, and cannot reach out and ask. Because if a person ghosts you it’s a hint that they don’t want to be in your life and I am not one to beg, I just let them go and move on with the life in front of me; focusing on those who do loyally choose to stay and stand by me. I find it to be the best expense of energy personally.
So, “vanish” is the word of the day. The picture is of a Red Cardinal, which to some represents a visit from someone who is thinking of you from afar, or from the afterlife. I thought it was a good symbol for this particular blog. Stay warm! Peace! ~MB