Back to Basics: Trust

Trust is something that is huge with me.  Honesty is the most redeeming quality a person can have in my opinion.  I seriously dislike dealing with sly or dishonest people.   Sly is even more aggravating than outwardly dishonest actually.  It’s one of the things that I notice when I get interested in women.  If they come off as sly or devious in anyway, you bet your ass I am going to be looking for that.  They’re the types that won’t give you a straight answer, who gloss over questions and avoid what they don’t wish for you to know.

I realize that I am having a huge issue with trust in my life right now.  It’s conditioning.  Many months of conditioning.  For some reason I think that if someone wants me to know something about them, if they want to share their life’s goings ons with me then they will offer up the information freely to me – perhaps because they trust me and want me to know.  Maybe this isn’t the best way to go about things.  Perhaps I need to be questioning more things and waiting for answers instead of just being good without the answer at that moment.

I tend to be very automatically trusting…I’m a trustworthy person myself.  I guess I expect that some trust with my friends and lovers.

*Note:  I am in a bit of a writing rut at the moment.  I have ended  the online relationship that I was involved in for the last 10 months, and it hurts. I’m working my way through it emotion by emotion.  I cared too much and I should have known better that there was really not future in the situation, or not one for me anyway.  I could not be contented with it the way it was. It’s not a bad thing, everyone needed to do what was best for them, and this is the best thing for me.  I want to meet a woman here in the states that wants to have a solid relationship that has a future.  And it will happen I am sure.  🙂

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Author: MainelyButch

I am a pretty relaxed, proud, Butch and a native Mainer who enjoys reading, writing, blogging, vlogging and social interaction. I live in southern Maine, near the coast with my 2 small dogs and I hail from a very large, loving family that is historically rooted here. I write about my life, my experiences, living successfully with HIV, my YouTube experiences, and just about anything that piques my interest. This blog may contain profanity and sexual situations, and is not intended for younger audiences. Read at your own risk. At 54 I see life as just beginning a new chapter, and have decide this is the time that I need to write the stories that got me to this point. I believe we live our lives in chapters, changing, evolving and moving continuously with the times. I love to laugh, have discussions, debates and even the occasional nonsense conversation! I generally enjoy people, but not drama, hatred, ignorance or those who choose to feel they are somehow elite or superior to another simply due to their mere existence. I try to be very conscious of the health of the world around me - environmentally, socially, economically, and ethically. The people who are dear to me know me as having a tough exterior, filled with marshmallow and crunchy peanut butter. I continually strive to be the best I can be, especially to address life head on...always.

4 thoughts on “Back to Basics: Trust”

  1. I am slow to trust and slow at becoming friends with new people. I can’t imagine exposing myself to potential partners – it is such a vulnerable thing to do – especially when you are Butch – and women have preconceived notions of who you are/should be. I really respect your desire and determination. I hope you find her and hope she knows how lucky she is.

    1. What an emphatic and sensitive reply … I hope for you, as well as for Ang, that you are both going to find soon the right person that matches entirely to your personality. A wonderful and kind soulmate that compensate the deprivation of a deep and serious relationship … be sure that they exist … maybe not that near that you want to .. but hopefully, not that far away as lately ..
      Dear Jamie Ray, I can understand u to 100%, as I´m a slow trusting, reserved person too and even so I found online my soulmate. We don´t see each other as often as we want to, that´s the reverse side, of a LDR, but the fact that she´s my one and only soulmate, comforts me and support me through all the painfull loneliness of daily life. The few times we got to see each other are so intense and breathtaking that makes me forget the rest of the year pretty quickly ! 😀 ( we are now almost 16 months “together” … ) 🙂 … maybe that could be an option 4 u to bridge the time (or a gap) till u found your soulmate too .. sort of training about how to step up to other people and cope with shyness .. 😉 It´s worth trying !!!!! 😀 .. may I ask how old r u and how long is it since your last longterm relationship. ?!? (excuse my curiosity ..but I´m a female !!!! L.O.L 😀 )
      I wish you both a very nice day and keep your chins up ! 😀
      Peace ! 🙂

      1. Hi Maria,
        I have partner (long term) whom I love, but I always think about what would happen if either she left me or if I was widowed. I was lucky this time around!

  2. you will find a good woman who meets or exceeds all your expectations and who fulfills all your wants and needs , she is out there let your light shine like a beacon in the night and she will find you, never give up, as Jamie said , your desire and determination are very respected

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