Then there are these days that I feel so damned good…even pretty silly and a bit daring. I woke up this morning with a touch of this mischievous beast in me. I feel like a different person on days like this, all of this pent up energy sort of bubbling to the surface. I get that some of it is nervous energy. Some of it comes from upping my activity level by warp speeds the last week. I’ve been so busy working and stuff that I have evidently shifted a gear inside that is keeping me up on this motivated sort of plane of existence.
The weather has been quite awesome lately. Hazy, hot and humid, just the way I like it. Fuck the winter and snow, this is how it should be year round in my life — I wish! 🙂 It’s raining today and I got up early, around 6am and started doing a really thorough cleaning of my cave here. I’d sort of let it go the last couple of weeks, our of both laziness and depression. I had a real “fuck it” attitude going on, and I knew it. I had to bust out of it, so I picked up some outside work this week and got out into the sunshine and nice weather. A good dose of vitamin Sunshine and I physically feel a hell of a lot better. Plus I am sleeping pretty good from both being out in the sun all day and from just pure exhaustion. Either way, the solid sleep feels pretty damned good, and is definitely what I needed.
I got my medications back on track, that took me a week to get it back right, but it’s all good now. Taking all my doses on schedule and got it all straightened out. It’s not good to take the drug holidays like I do, but occasionally I get so tired of taking all these required medications every day, three times a day, that I just get fed up and then I say fuck it and just quit taking them for a while. It’s a bit dangerous to do with my HIV meds because it increases the chances of building a tolerance to them. I’ve lucked out though and that hasn’t happened yet. I’ve been doing the “drug holidays” from my HIV meds for years, taking them for like 6 months religiously then laying off them for 1-2 months to let my liver and kidneys have a break. Thus far I haven’t built any tolerance to the cocktail of drugs that I am on for that condition. As for the anti-depressants, that’s the first time I have really done that with them. I know I have to take them because they do cause some major mood swings if I miss enough doses of them. I learned my lesson there, I won’t be doing that again. Although I may speak to my primary doctor about changing up the medications in the near future, as I feel like these that I have been on the last 3 years aren’t really working as well as they used to work. But for now I am back on them and being good about not missing my doses.
The puppy is getting big, she’s all legs now, looks a bit out of kilter in her growth. And her “fuzzy” puppy coat is changing slowly over to a more adult textured coat. She’s got some coloring like big wide reddish strip down her back and she’s blonde in the face, ears and head, the rest of her is white. She’s going to be a pretty little Pom when she’s done going through the weird little growth spurts. She’s weighing in at about 2.4 pounds now. And she’s very strong. Her personality is excellent. I like that she’s VERY social and loves to play. She loves everyone she meets, greeting everyone with that same puppy excitement and kisses. When I hold my hands down around my knees she will jump into them, so I am thinking that I can train her to jump up into my arms if I keep working with her on it. She and Nola are getting along better and better. Nola is quite protective of her. Especially when they are out around other dogs or cats, Nola watches over her and doesn’t let the other animals mess with her too much. Not that any of them, like my sister’s dog Brando, would hurt her but they are curious and want to play with her. Nola isn’t too keen on letting anyone play with “her” puppy! It’s kind of cute. But at the same time it’s not good because Nola was never socialized to other dogs properly — my fault I know, as I didn’t think to expose her to alot of other dogs, thus now I pay the price as she is anti-social with other (especially larger breed) dogs. So with the puppy I am trying to give her as much exposure to other people and other dogs and cats as possible so that I won’t have two anti-social creatures on my hands! I’m hoping that while I ‘m raising Lulu some of the socialization stuff will favorably rub off on Nola. Poor girl is just miserable around larger dogs. With small dogs she’s just fine, and once she gets used to them she will even try to play. Nola will be 8 on June 10th, I hope she’s not too old to learn some new tricks! 🙂 She is a pretty smart little dog, just very sensitive and not like the other dogs. She requires my full attention when she’s in unfamiliar surroundings, and she’s unsure of herself sometimes I think.
One of my aquarium fish died yesterday. My favorite one, the turquoise gourami. I’m not sure why, but I found him floating yesterday. That’s the first fish I’ve lost since I put them in the tank. So it’s not a bad mortality rate at all. The tank has been up a couple of months now. I have to get an algae eater, as the tank’s ecosystem is finally settled in and it’s starting to get a little green algae from the live plants in there. I had been waiting to get the pleckotemous algae eater because there just wasn’t enough food in there yet for one to survive (they primarily eat the algae in the tank). But it’s time now. So perhaps this week I’ll swing by Petco and pick up one that’s around 2 inches long. And while I am there I will also probably get more of the live plants. Right now the tank is about 2/3 artificial plants and 1/3 live plants. To keep the ecosystem in balance you cannot just add all new live plants at once, so I am doing it in stages. I will replace another 1/3 of the artificial ones with live ones. I will also buy a manual algae scraper so that if the build up on the glass becomes a problem before the plecko can catch up. Right now I only have a few spots of live algae. The water chemistry is perfect, so it baffles me what killed my favorite fish. Aquarium keeping is something that I have done since I got my first one at 6 yrs old (for Christmas that year), and I generally have a pretty good handle on taking care of my tanks quite well.
I spent the morning in between my cleaning of the different rooms in my home, watching Indy car racing live from Detroit. They were racing 70 laps, or two hours, which ever came first because of rain. I’ve become pretty interested in auto racing lately. Yes, I did watch the Indy 500 just recently too. When I was a teenager I used to hang out at Lee Raceway over in Lee, New Hampshire and I loved it. We raced Yankee modifieds there in the 70’s and it was awesome. I still have a bunch of photos somewhere, but they are the old fashioned (eh!) hard copy photos, no digitals. I’ll dig up a digital to display here.
Yankee Mods where smaller cars, and the races were always exciting, many locals here raced and I dated a driver for a while when I was around 18, thus spent many weekends at that track having a blast. I really loved it. I’m not sure what the renewed interest in racing with me is, but I’ve really been enjoying watching the races and learning about things such as vintage model racing, which I watched a bunch about this morning. I am particularly drawn to vintage cars, so I can imagine vintage car racing is awesome as hell !
It’s almost 4pm on Sunday, and I am going to hunker down and watch a movie or two, cuddle with the dogs and think about sweeter things 😉 I do hope everyone has had a great weekend, where ever you are and whatever you are doing!