Rabbit Rabbit

Rabbit Rabbit…..it’s an old custom/suspicion to say Rabbit Rabbit on the first day of the new month, as your first words to greet the month and for good luck…which I desperately NEED right now.  I can’t sleep, my stomach is upset, my thoughts are jumbled and I’m having anxiety attacks faster than I can swallow the anti-anxiety pills.  Rabbit Rabbit, please fix this.

I’m up in the middle of the night, per usual, and reading.  I find reading can sometimes calm me and redirect my thoughts to other things.  It’s not working tonight so well, but I did just reblog a blog from SuddenAwareness about being Butch that was interesting.  I find that there are many flavors of Butch, I’m just one flavor and I do it MY way, as everyone should be free to do for themselves.  Butch type “traits” can be found in just about anyone actually, even if they don’t identify with Butch as their gender as I do.  The article is interesting, and really tears into the specifics of everything.

Coffee #2.  I have a close friend who is welcoming a new grandbaby into this world today, thank you C section.  Oh to be born on April 1st….the jokes will be endless for the child as she grows up I am sure.  I had an Aunt, rest her soul, who was born on this day.  It’s one of those birthday days that is not easily forgettable, kind of like being born on a leap year February 29th.  I just hope and pray the baby is born and everything is okay for both her and her mom.  I’m sure my friend will be present for the birth and will be right in line to hold the little bundle of joy….Congratulations to them all!  And welcome to this fucked up world little one!

Coffee #3….ok, I am wide awake!  Looks like a nap will be in order later today.

On a political note….Indiana, and now Arkansas, have passed these “religious freedom” bills that make it legal for businesses to discriminate against LGBT people, based upon the so-said “religious beliefs” of the business or it’s owners (i.e. Hobby Lobby as an example, hates LGBT people).  It’s all over social media and our news programs because it’s become a hot topic of debate this week.  Personally I was pretty shocked when the Indiana governor signed the bill into law.  It doesn’t make sense to have a law that is so blatantly wrong.  And it just shows how backwards some parts of our country still are today.

The backlash of passing such a law in Indiana and Arkansas has people like Apple’s CEO and now Walmart’s CEO saying they will boycott states that pass such discriminatory laws…One up for Walmart…years ago they were not on the right side of history on this issue either.  I recall in the early 80’s when an issue of Newsweek came out about “Lesbians” and Walmart would not sell the issue or display it on their racks (I happened to have been IN that issue as a lesbian veteran) and this caused a huge uproar in the LGBT community, making us boycott Walmart for some time.  I’m not saying that Walmart has gotten vastly better on this issue, but I think that they have progressed some.

Recently I visited the local new Hobby Lobby, just out of curiosity.  And it was just plain scary.  The religious overtone of the whole place was just weird.  Jesus was in about every display in some form or another, and I didn’t care for it being so blatantly in my face.  Plus the people even had been imported from some southern Baptist place it seemed.  Believe me my friend and I were watched carefully through our whole visit….and eyed with some serious amount of distrust.  I couldn’t get out of there fast enough, and I will never go back there.  It’s not a place I feel welcome or that I can support with my money.  I’ll be sticking with Michael’s for my crafting supplies, believe me.

I don’t believe that anyone has the right to discriminate against anyone else for race, religion, gender, sexual orientation or anything else.  In a perfect world this wouldn’t happen, but we don’t live in that perfect world.  I hope that the governor of Indiana lives up to his promise to fix the law so that it’s clear that it will not discriminate as it does now.  And as for Arkansas…well, they are just backwards to begin with.  I lived there in Arkansas for a short time, and the religious overtones and blatant discrimination drove me out –along with the very real amount of white supremacy and racism that I encountered while there.  It’s no wonder that the KKK still successfully thrives in Arkansas, and it’s a shameful thing.

With that being said, I am happy to say that Maine has anti-discrimination laws and I am glad that I live here.  It may not be the best climate (in my opinion because I hate winter) all the time, but it’s a nice place to live.  A very diverse area, where I can happily live and exist openly as a Butch lesbian without much fear of recrimination or discrimination.  While I have encountered discrimination here, it’s been from individuals and not from business entities.  I encountered severe discrimination and outward hatred in both Arkansas and Utah for being who I am…major incidents primarily with hospitals in both places occurred.  Sad events, but very eye-opening for sure.

Ok, I think I will have another coffee and try some more reading.  I hope you, dear readers, are having great days!



3 thoughts on “Rabbit Rabbit

  1. Okay, I can’t believe what I just read in your next post! In all my years of knowing you, I’ve never seen you drop social media for ANY reason! You’re a gifted writer and inspirational for a lot of people, what is this BS !? I don’t like seeing you pushed into a corner and I HATE seeing you SO upset!!! You have every right to write, think, be, who you are, what you’re about, and to keep things between you..and whoever you choose, if you choose! Your blog is your outlet in so many ways! Here…you can have my rabbit, rabbit too…and my friendship and if you need ANYTHING, please don’t hesitate to ask! I’m SO mad right now! (not at you) but the fact is that you shouldn’t compromise yourself in any way, shape or form for anything or anybody!!! I hope you rethink this decision, I feel like it is based on rash emotions, just breathe and reconsider. I appreciate your passion for writing and blogging, as do many, and I hope you find your way out of the rabbit hole because you don’t deserve and there’s no reason that you should be so broken that you feel as if you can’t put yourself out there and express yourself!


  2. Ang every so often I open google mail, (not my primary) and binge read I see
    the last couple blogs here, and am surprised by their content. Whatever it is that is facilitating your current mood and situation I truly hope it disipates immediately and that you find yourself healthy and happy. Wishing you all goodness.



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