Butch Lesbians Don’t Exist….huh?

I have just read and reread twice a very convoluted blog by a radical feminist, who I think is probably also a TERF, where she calms that Butch lesbians do not exist.  To her I say here I am mother fucker.  In the flesh.  I am a Butch lesbian and damned proud of it.  I was not socialized Butch, I was not “made” Butch.  Butch is my gender identity, period.  I have been this way all my life.  I grew up knowing I was Butch, no matter how many times I was feminized by clothing or adornments, I was still Butch.  I was clocked from the time I was a teenager as a lesbian.  There was no single thing that happened to me, I wasn’t abused or violated.  I don’t hate men.  And I don’t hate women.

This blogger is ballsy, to say that Butch women try to be superior to women in general.  That they use their masculinity to degrade women.  She claims that the Butch/Femme dynamic is unhealthy to women.  That is a hetronormative hierarchy that keeps women down.  This has not been my experience at all.

When sales people or anyone tries to sell something that they don’t know about I call them “feather merchants”.  This blogger is a serious “feather merchant”. She knows nothing about Butch or Femme or the dynamics that shape our lives, and our loves.  She knows nothing about gender.  She can try to sell you the feathers, but she doesn’t know how they are formed or what they are useful for, because she isn’t the bird who grew them and uses them.  To sell anything, and that includes an idea, you must live part of it, you must believe in it and you must know what you speak about.

The whole article that she wrote is full of serious Butch bashing bullshit.  She hits Butches from every angle possible trying to negate our existence.  This is the kind of hurtful shit that really gets to me.  To tell me that I don’t exists because of what I am in this world.  That hurts.

I didn’t choose to be Butch, it’s just who I AM.  It just turned out to be who I grew to be through my life and my ways.  The mere pondering that Butch is to be dismissed as some radical take on masculinity for patriarchal purpose is just stupid.

Obviously this article makes me think about the whole Lesbian community…hell the whole Queer community.  There seem to be so many kinds of people, and I truly believe that it takes all kinds to make a community.  We should be mutually supportive of each other as human beings – let alone as women.  I personally happen to be Butch, you can be whatever you choose to be or not to be, but for God’s sake be yourself comfortably and without harming or bashing others for doing the same thing. I have friends who do not identify as Butch or Femme, who just identify as lesbians in general.  Then I have many who do identify within the Butch/Femme spectrum and who are very happy.  We don’t see this as being misogynist or as disrespectful to women at all.  We worship women, hell we’re all lesbian in the end!

I am going to put a link to the offending blog here.  I’d just let you know your comments won’t make it on there if they are against her opinions, she screens them all out.  Be ready to be angry, be ready to be amazed that this woman calls herself a radical feminist.  She forgets history and how things happened.

Oh, and here’s a real Butch lesbian for ya….Picture 278

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Author: MainelyButch

I am a pretty relaxed, proud, Butch and a native Mainer who enjoys reading, writing, blogging, vlogging and social interaction. I live in southern Maine, near the coast with my 2 small dogs and I hail from a very large, loving family that is historically rooted here. I write about my life, my experiences, living successfully with HIV, my YouTube experiences, and just about anything that piques my interest. This blog may contain profanity and sexual situations, and is not intended for younger audiences. Read at your own risk. At 54 I see life as just beginning a new chapter, and have decide this is the time that I need to write the stories that got me to this point. I believe we live our lives in chapters, changing, evolving and moving continuously with the times. I love to laugh, have discussions, debates and even the occasional nonsense conversation! I generally enjoy people, but not drama, hatred, ignorance or those who choose to feel they are somehow elite or superior to another simply due to their mere existence. I try to be very conscious of the health of the world around me - environmentally, socially, economically, and ethically. The people who are dear to me know me as having a tough exterior, filled with marshmallow and crunchy peanut butter. I continually strive to be the best I can be, especially to address life head on...always.

4 thoughts on “Butch Lesbians Don’t Exist….huh?”

  1. Holy shit!! I just read her blog post, it’s a good thing I am not in the same room as her, she is so profoundly wrong on so many levels, that post was written in pure HATE, if this is what the modern LBGTQ community looks like, I want absolutely NO part of it at all! and if this is the new Feminism… I want no part of that Bullshit train either, TERF or not, that is just revolting and hateful. she is what I call a FemNazi (feminist nazi), her and her ilk are no different than the homophobic and extreme religious right wingers, they hate anything or anyone who differs from their point of view on how everyone should look , act, be, it’s people like her that set feminism back 30 years and make it easy for the homophobic to hate, does she not realize any of this?

  2. I am astounded at how much of this bashing of Butch and Trans* folks goes on inside of the LGBTQ community itself, it’s like a snake eating it’s own tail…doesn’t make a lick of sense to me. I am outraged by this, as you are my friend. And this kind of spewed hatred is doing no one any good, it’s just downright idiotic in my opinion. People should respect all other people’s needs to be who they are meant to be, without fear and oppression. ~MB

  3. I found it really hard to read, mainly because it wasn’t written well at all. I agree that she seemed to be making some huge sweeping generalizations based on a couple of examples of butches behaving badly. We all know that there are bad examples of every type of person in the world so to pick out the worst examples of butch behavior as the “norm” is very unfair. It seems to me what she was trying to say is that she doesn’t think butch should exist because she wants the world to be gender-less. It’s not the worst rad fem blog post I’ve read but certainly not the best either. Personally, I just ignore ignorant rants like this.

  4. I think it’s a fanatical need for ideological purity, a sort of fundamentalism: gender is what we say it is (a social construct) and it’s that and nothing else, and can be nothing else.

    I’m guessing most of us agree with the social construct bit to a large extent, in that society perpetuates and propagates rigid and oppressive and false ideas of what each person’s gender should be and must be, according to binary sex assigned at birth. Hell, we run up against that all the time. But that doesn’t mean that every individual person’s gender is, our genders are, constructed and false. Just back off with that crap already.

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