I Talk A Lot, But Not About That

Ok Bois this one may be a bit deep, but I think Kink knocks it out of the park with this blog. Just sayin…. ~MB

Kink Praxis

When we talk about play in kink community, we often focus on the bottom’s experience, the bottom’s desires and needs, the bottom’s journey in a scene, without discussing the top’s experience, desires, needs, or journey. I’ve seen this in the way we talk about negotiation, warm up, and aftercare, where the focus is on the top’s skills at uncovering the bottom’s limits, needs, and desires. (It is often not imagined or considered that tops might have limits, needs or desires.) I’ve also seen this in educational settings where the focus is often on tops learning practical skills, and what that kind of play might feel like for the bottom, without including what the top feels, wants, or experiences in the conversation. (And without acknowledging that there are practical skills for bottoms as well that might be worth discussing.) It’s as if we are stuck in the idea that…

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