Hiatus…naw…

I was thinking that I was going to take a hiatus from writing in this blog.  Seems that you can’t write without self-censorship today.  Whenever I have written about other people in my life in my blog I have kept them as anonymous as absolutely necessary and possible.  I give people nick names and my lips are sealed with their real identities….  Yet it’s not enough.  So, I was thinking that unless I have something that’s not about my life to write I would not be writing about it here, because I would rather be silent than to self-censor my words and thoughts.  And I don’t care to hurt anyone’s feelings or make them feel uncomfortable with my writing, I seriously don’t.

Problem here is that writing is what I do and do best.  and If I can’t write about my thoughts and what’s happening in my own life when I feel like it then what’s the use?  It saddens me that my words get picked apart and sometimes someone will focus on just the one line of a post and not read the more important parts of the post.  It saddens me that I have to go back to trying to write about my life, without really writing about my life.  I’ve always done my best to protect the identities of people who require it in my blog posts.  And I think I have done a good job of it.

I write a fucking stupid blog online that a handful of people read.  My blog is not famous and is definitely not front page fodder for gossip.

I’m a very even tempered kinda guy. I’m also fairly outspoken and opinionated, I know it.  But, I don’t hold grudges or let negative shit hang around in my brain long.  Get over it is my motto.  If it’s not going to affect your paycheck or you won’t die from it then get over it.  Maybe I am too laid back about it all.  I don’t believe there is much in life that’s worth getting too riled up about, if it’s going to happen, it’s going to happen. Sometimes that’s that fun of it all too.

I have actually given some serious thought to giving the poly lifestyle another chance…it would be so much easier I think to develop friendships that include casual sexual encounters for fun and a good time.  No strings, no commitments, no attachments and no copping feelings for someone.  It sounds so fucking easy and I suppose that it is for someone like me who can delininiate between sex pure and simple and loving/making love.  But I seem to be attracted to women who are more into monogamy, and I too have some desire for that security as well…sometimes I just think it’s a toss up.

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Author: MainelyButch

I am a pretty relaxed, proud, Butch and a native Mainer who enjoys reading, writing, blogging, vlogging and social interaction. I live in southern Maine, near the coast with my 2 small dogs and I hail from a very large, loving family that is historically rooted here. I write about my life, my experiences, living successfully with HIV, my YouTube experiences, and just about anything that piques my interest. This blog may contain profanity and sexual situations, and is not intended for younger audiences. Read at your own risk. At 54 I see life as just beginning a new chapter, and have decide this is the time that I need to write the stories that got me to this point. I believe we live our lives in chapters, changing, evolving and moving continuously with the times. I love to laugh, have discussions, debates and even the occasional nonsense conversation! I generally enjoy people, but not drama, hatred, ignorance or those who choose to feel they are somehow elite or superior to another simply due to their mere existence. I try to be very conscious of the health of the world around me - environmentally, socially, economically, and ethically. The people who are dear to me know me as having a tough exterior, filled with marshmallow and crunchy peanut butter. I continually strive to be the best I can be, especially to address life head on...always.

10 thoughts on “Hiatus…naw…”

  1. Personally, I think that you shouldn’t worry about what other people say.. These are YOUR feelings and I love ❤ to get to know you better.. I look forward to reading your blogs.. To me, it makes me proud to get to be a part of your life, which is amazing.. I’m going to miss reading your thoughts..
    Rach

  2. Your writing was part of my daily routine I am going to miss your posts but I do understand 100% Take care of you and I look forward to anything you post ❤

  3. there is another option…..write what’s in your heart for those of us who look forward to reading your work and let the nay-sayers ‘nay-say’ elsewhere 🙂

  4. Hope it will be a short hiatus. I’m careful about what I write about Donna (nothing about our sex life) and about being respectful of her and her privacy.

    You should be able to blog freely, even though you have chosen (as I have) not to be anonymous. All the best,
    Jamie

  5. Yes you will be missed. I ca relate to the self censoring. And the difficulties it can pose. I have gone so far as wondering how to delete some readers of my blog that are in my day to day life to deal with it. Have no idea if it’s possible. Your writing will be missed.

  6. Don’t you dare! I love your openness and honesty! I personally am fascinated by your personal life – it makes you real 🙂 I could care less about factual blogs – I like making virtual friends all over the world that I hope to meet in person someday. Maybe keep your blog anonymous to those you are dating. Then you can talk about um and they will never know 😉

    1. Wow, thank you Heather, I appreicate this comment very much! I laughed at the fascination with my personal life…it’s true it’s something you couldn’t write, some days I feel like I’m in a movie watching myself…hahahah. I never disclose who I am writing about by name, always by nickname or something geographic…like the “girl from east bejesus”, etc. I don’t know why it would bother anyone, no one knows who they are except them themselves!!! Rock on! ~MB 🙂

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