Things Butch-Femme

High Maintenance

I have a lot to get done today.  It’s raining and not a good day to finish my raking as I had planned, but I have a bunch of errands in town to get accomplished anyways.  Seems that I now have a home phone number that I was completely unaware of until I paid my cable bill the other day and the lady told me I have a land line number attached to the account.  So I have to buy a phone that works with that so that I can actually use it as a back up phone and to make calls that I can’t make on my cell phone.  I haven’t had a land line phone since I lived at the farm…so this is different.

High maintenance….those words elicit cringes among many Butches I am sure.  When you have that high maintenance woman in your life it’s a daily chore to just keep up, am I right?  There are high maintenance friendships in our lives as well, all kinds of high maintenance relationships can develop.  My mother is rather high maintenance.  I have to pay attention to her pretty much on a daily basis or she gets antsy about what I am doing or where I am.  She worries about me I know.  And I love her for that, so I don’t mind the maintenance that goes into our relationship as mother and daughter at all.  I’ve definitely given the high maintenance thing a bit of thought lately.  It seems that people who are worth your time are sometimes just higher maintenance because you choose to let them be that way in your life. Or I have in mine.  I don’t mind the maintenance when it’s someone that I am really wanting to be there for in that way.

Funny story…I was with my mom and sister the other day having lunch at our favorite hang out, the Rusty Hammer in Portsmouth.   I wanted a Jimmi Juice for lunch…it’s a hella hard ass cocktail and is usually only served over at The Old Ferry Landing, on the other side of town, it’s their signature drink.  but the waitress said she could make me one as she also worked for the Landing and knew the recipe.

She made me the beverage, to perfection, and very strong.  It was funny because she was all touching me and couldn’t get close enough when talking to me at the table.  After several visits back to our table to make sure we were happy and contented I asked if I could have the pint glass that my drink came served in, offering to pay for it even – it had a moustache and a very cool logo – it would fit perfectly in my pint glasses collection!  She said she would see what she could do to get it for me.

Then before I left she came over, put her hand on my thigh leaned in and whispered to me to go ahead and take the glass and put it in my coat pocket and handed me a small piece of paper with her number on it.  Right in front of my Mother and sister….she hit on me!  I was flattered, but I did throw the number away…she was sweet, but not for me.

I’ve been spending quite a lot of time online talking with my American friend who lives abroad…who you all know as Mushy by now, and that is not her real name.  She keeps me quite intrigued and a little bit smitten.  We now have taken to Skyping quite often, and it’s always a great start to my day when we Skype in the morning. It still amazes me that someone who has such a busy and structured life can find time to fit me into her days as much as she does.  We use WhatsApp constantly and Skype at least once, if not twice a day.  She really makes me smile and feel good inside.  I’m wishing she would come visit the US soon…I’d really love to see her. Yes, my crush on her hasn’t abated and it’s just gotten stronger as I have gotten to know her better.  Thank the universe for that WhatsApp program, because I am sure AT&T doesn’t want me texting Barcelona daily.   I love listening to her talk, to her excitement about her work and to stories about her cat and her friends there.  Some of them I am beginning to think I know vicariously.

Of course my crush on Mushy has me pondering age differences a little bit again.  She’s 34 and I am 52….that’s a pretty big difference. Hell I was in the Army when she was being born.  Age hasn’t bothered me before much. I’ve dated women in their early 20’s previously.  And I didn’t care for that because, while the sex was hot, the conversation was pretty much non-existant.  They didn’t care as they were both looking for a Daddi type and at the time I filled that spot for them.  They were both too young to understand much of the world as I had already come to understand it.  Mushy is a quite a bit older than they were and much more mature. She’s got herself together much more than even most 34 yr. olds that I know…far more together.  I enjoy our interactions so very much.  I don’t think I could get enough of her if we talked for days straight.

It’s all probably craziness anyway.  She lives in Barcelona Spain right now and I live in Maine.  Our chances to spend any time together are pretty slim. But still I want to spend as much time talking to her as I possibly can.  She just makes my days much brighter and happier; she cheers me right up.   One of the things that I like about her is that she takes things very seriously.  When we schedule a Skype session she’s right on time….I on the other hand have overslept 3 times now and missed our calls…not good, especially when I’m trying to be attentive.

Anything that doesn’t go the way Mushy plans it messes up her day.  She’s a creature of habit…very much so, and now that I am part of her daily life she plans me into her schedule and around her work.  I’m completely flattered and honored by this, and I think it’s great.  I just feel like an idiot when I oversleep and miss her calls.  See, our time difference is 6 hours.  So if we Skype in her mornings after she works out and gets to her office it’s like 8am her time, and 2am my time…so I need to be awake.  Usually I am, it’s just when I wake up in the middle of the night, so it’s worked out well except those couple of times that I dozed back off while she was at the gym.

So despite my best efforts not to let myself get to overly attached to anyone one it seems to be happening anyway.  I don’t know why I don’t just stay to myself…guess I am a glutton for punishment and just can’t help myself.  At least I pick some beautiful women to side-track me.  🙂  Seriously I do.  I have to say I have had no problem in my interactions over time with some very pretty women.  I like that about my life for sure, it’s been a definite bonus.  And my Barcelona connection does not disappoint, she’s very nice on the eyes for sure.

I’ve never spent so much time talking to a woman as I have with Mushy…it’s kind of amazing.  We can talk and laugh for a couple of hours on Skype and still we don’t want to hang up. I swear I could look at her and talk to her for a very, very long time.   I think she’s just freaking awesome.

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3 thoughts on “High Maintenance”

  1. Welcome back to the falling into the land of sweet headiness! It’s got to be the most wonderous place on earth – yup! freaking awesome lol. And “Barcelona” is sooo sexy 😉

  2. ahhhhhh that is so cool, your long distance daily relationship with Mushy. for myself I know that my internet friends add a whole new dimension to my life. i tell myself to simply enjoy what I have for what it is, same for you, keep right on keeping on – and enjoy and no one knows what the future will bring. 😉

  3. Donna is 26 years older than me – I was 24 and she was 50 when we met. The age difference has pro’s and con’s but I hate to think I might have walked away because she was “too old”. A trans-Atlantic difference might get in the way, but don’t let the age stop you.

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