Night Dreams

My night dreams are sporadic and charged with sexual energy usually.  Last night I recall a forbidden kiss (or several actually) with a beautiful woman.  A precursor to reality I do hope. Because I certainly intend to do a hella lot more kissing before I am done in this life.  I love kissing and am damned good at it I might add, no matter where I am kissing.  

Funny, suddenly I am receiving more notes and emails from interested women…not that I am in any way looking at this time; my plate is quite full of just life and the things that I am hoping to bring to my life.  Although I am always flattered when I do get an email from a sweet woman.  But alas, I am hoping that I can continue the conversation I have been having for the last couple of months, fate willing.  She had become very endeared to me, and I guess I struck a nerve with her, so she’s currently ignoring me…hell, I’m used to being ignored, so it’s no big deal.  I do hope she comes around though, and realizes that I am only being me, and she said wanted that…

I am naturally fairly stoic and don’t let a lot of things bother me, especially things that I have no way of reaching out and grabbing a hold of, throwing up against a wall and dealing with right then and there. In this case there are oceans and continents in the way.  Yes, it bothers me that she won’t communicate with me, but what the hell can I do about it?  Not a damned thing.  Ball is in her court.  I can only wait and see what happens.  Maybe this is the “out” she’s looking for to go back to her ‘monogamous’ relationship with her partner there.  Maybe she’s a little jealous that I might have had a date.  I have no way of knowing what the real deal is unless she chooses to tell me. Thus I am not going to worry about it, because honestly it does not affect my daily life here right now….sigh…just affects my heart a little.  



Author: MainelyButch

I am a pretty relaxed, proud, Butch and a native Mainer who enjoys reading, writing, blogging, vlogging and social interaction. I live in southern Maine, near the coast with my 2 small dogs and I hail from a very large, loving family that is historically rooted here. I write about my life, my experiences, living successfully with HIV, my YouTube experiences, and just about anything that piques my interest. This blog may contain profanity and sexual situations, and is not intended for younger audiences. Read at your own risk. At 54 I see life as just beginning a new chapter, and have decide this is the time that I need to write the stories that got me to this point. I believe we live our lives in chapters, changing, evolving and moving continuously with the times. I love to laugh, have discussions, debates and even the occasional nonsense conversation! I generally enjoy people, but not drama, hatred, ignorance or those who choose to feel they are somehow elite or superior to another simply due to their mere existence. I try to be very conscious of the health of the world around me - environmentally, socially, economically, and ethically. The people who are dear to me know me as having a tough exterior, filled with marshmallow and crunchy peanut butter. I continually strive to be the best I can be, especially to address life head on...always.

1 thought on “Night Dreams”

  1. And people think we lesbians have an easier time dating other women. Certainly not always the case. The only thing I know for sure is that flowers always brings a smile to my gal pal’s face. Cheers.

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