LGBT Community Issues, Relationships, Things Butch-Femme


I have sat down to blog several times, and also to do my vlogs on Youtube…but it seems that something new is happening just about every day lately.  Thus, writing or filming goes undone, and my notes pile up and pile up.  Yes, I am a prolific note taker for those who do not know, I keep notes for everything.  It’s how I navigate my days.  I start the note the night before, so I get the right things done the following day.  Often notes spill over into other notes, and sometimes lists go completely undone due to something else popping up!

This week we have seen the passing of the historic and cultural icon Storme’ DeLavaries, the “Stonewall Lesbian” and well known “LBGT community’s Rosa Parks”.  I did a previous blog about Storme’ and you may want to read that and google for more information on this fascinating person.

Then yesterday I am sitting here at my computer preparing for some morning writing and up pops the news that Maya Angelou passed away.  I was stunned to say the least.  I guess I always expected her to live forever.  Her words will live forever, undoubtedly.  So much of what she said in her poetry, her stories, her quotes, made the world a better place.  She should be proud; she led a wonderful, albeit difficult at times, life and she single handedly contributed so much to the good of the world.  I will refer to her words still, and I will remember her with the utmost of respect and fondness.

On a rather personal note…something I am not always comfortable with in my blogs, my gf and I are no longer in a relationship.  Before you jump to conclusions, let me say it was an amiable split.  We are both looking for something different, and although she is my very best friend in this world, I could not honestly be the lover that she wished for in life.  It’s hard only because we are fond of one another, and do not wish to hurt each other, but we know this is the best thing.  She has a big family in Virginia that she misses very much, and my family is all here in the local area.  Her family needs her there, as my family needs me here.  She has 2 adult daughters, 3 grandchildren and aging parents who could use her being closer and available when they need her.  I stay in Maine for that same reason – to be here if my family should ever need me.

We have been packing up all of her things.  And I have rented a truck for Sunday. We will pack on Sunday and embark on the journey back to Virginia – the short way this time – on Monday morning, bright and early.  Barring any severe traffic issues we should arrive at our destination around 7pm on Monday night – which is her eldest daughter’s birthday! Yay!  Angel will be travelling with us of course, she is Kat’s dog.  And Nola will be spending the time with my mom, her Nana, while I take care of business in Virginia.

Hopefully we have secured an apartment for her that should be ready to move into when we arrive.  I am keeping my fingers crossed that everything goes smoothly with that and we do not end up having to put her things into storage.  My ideal would be to move her right into a nice little house where she and Angel can thrive and be close to their family once again.  I’m doing my best to make sure it goes off as smoothly, and with the least amount of trauma to anyone, as possible.  I just want to see them both settled into a nice secure location that they can be happy in and that will keep me from worrying too much!

I will then head up to Richmond early on Wednesday morning and catch an 8:20am flight back to Boston then catch the C&J Limousine back to Portsmouth and pick up my truck at the bus terminal at Pease Tradeport and head to get Miss Nola.  This is where the stress will come in, she will be looking for Kat and Angel – especially Angel, of course.  I hate it when she mopes, but I am bracing myself for the “super mopey dog” phase that she will undoubtedly go through for a few days.  I will do my best to shower her with extra lovin and to take her places to get her mind off of the empty house.

So, it’s back to living alone, which is something that i actually excel at generally.  I have a bunch of home renovation projects planned and will be busy.  Hopefully I will be too busy between home projects, June’s Pride events, the hot summer weather and then fall’s fairs and festivals to get bored or lonely.  But when I do, I can reach out and call a friend, a dear, dear friend in Virginia.  Somehow she always knows what to say to me to make me snap out of my funks.  Thank God for having her in my life.


5 thoughts on “Endings

  1. diana says:

    Sorry your single again,very respectful of how you are dealing with this. Just another fork in the road.Sending good karma your way.


  2. This move is definitely something that was discussed and each of us, being on a different plain in our life, with different views of each of our wants and needs, culminated in our decision. We have been friends for going on 6 years and just because we each need something different in our lives doesn’t mean that we will show any disrespect for that, because there is no reason for us to go down that road. We are both similarly attached to our families, have come to the conclusion that we aren’t meant to be gfs and there are needs that can’t be met by me being here in Maine and I know she feels the same way about her family and life. We both have a strong tie to each other as best friends, and she is as big a help to me as I am to her, and I thank her for sharing that with you all. I have an immense amount of respect for her and cherish our friendship and we will continue on in life sharing our separate lives and moments in them with each other. Angel will miss Nola and I know there will be an adjustment period, hopefully a small female pup for Nola will be the cure, but I know Ang will be pouring extra cuddles and love as I will with Angel. This is an amicable split, with no disrespect, no angst, and no finger pointing, sometimes life deals you changes that are unexpected, but it doesn’t mean you have to make it hard…it’s always a choice, and we chose this for ourselves ❤


    • RJS says:

      We were looking forward to meeting you. Sorry, that we couldn’t do it sooner. Perhaps, our paths will still cross. I wish you and Angie the best.


      • Yes, we will meet! I am busy with Flea Market season at the moment, and the weather has been just crappy! I think I am going to go up to Portland Pride on the 21st, will you also be attending? Kat is doing good, she’s got a nice little place in VA and is pretty happy to be back near her family I believe.


  3. We’re not really Pride people, but thanks for asking. (We’re kinda claustrophobic about crowds.) We love flea markets, however, so let me know if you’ll be near here. I want the rain to stop,now!


Leave Your Feedback!

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.