Writing is an outlet for me, it’s where I can just get things out of my head for a few minutes. But sometimes you have to have self-restraint, self-control and let logic play a part in your posts. While I want go OFF I am going to let it go pretty quickly here. I can’t allow myself to be bullied into regret. And what I would like to post would only cause me to scold myself later, thus regret. Yes, somethings are best left unsaid and private. This is one of those times. And while I won’t lie down to be dragged through the mud, I will first contemplate my words so that they are clearly understood. I hold no animosity, only sadness that some have to let their words be weapons intended to hurt and I in turn let them hurt.
Each of us, as humans, choose our own road. No one drags us down them. And no one can call our direction except us. I dictate my own direction, and if I am not into something I am not going to pretend that I am and fake it…I am going to just move on, and try to do so without causing a lot of commotion while doing so. I don’t think that I owe anyone else an reason beyond the fact that I’m just not as interested as I thought I was, do I? You know that feeling of starting something that you feel you are into, then after you do it a while you see – after further interaction – that it’s just not your cup of tea; thus you just don’t feel the need to keep doing it? Yeah, that’s it. That’s what happened with me, and now I am being ridiculed for my own personal feelings, and having my character attacked…that just isn’t right. And now it’s time to just let it go. Nothing can be un-done, nothing can be repaired, and nothing can be said that would further either side’s idea of what happened, or what is right or wrong. Period.
Great post… sorry for the difficulties you’ve been through… this happens in life sometimes and even though we cannot control the actions of others, we can certainly control how we respond to them. Good for you for standing up for yourself and moving forward. Those other people… well… they just need to build a bridge and get over it! 🙂
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Seems like there is always a need for a “right” and “wrong” side of things. Wouldn’t it be great if life were really that black and white. Hang in there. My Momma always said to ‘trust you’re gut’. It’s painful when they name your name, but time has a way of making things right…. Stay so strong.
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There is never a good reason to ridicule anyone, ever. Even when a relationship goes bad, it is always better to say how you feel, acknowledge how the other person says they feel, apologize, and move on. There is nothing to be gained by hurting another. Take good care of yourself and keep writing.
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I know you have spoken before about how you struggle with words and prefer the medium of writing. Do you think this contributed to the communication breakdown? I know that I would certainly prefer to offer up a lengthy, well conceived letter of explanation, than try and verbalize what can sometimes be convoluted emotions. Its always hard to bring an ending to something that still has threads of entanglement, houses, morgages, money, cars, pets etc Aaah the joys of love
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